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Hmm. What's that I smell?
What the heck?!
Nobody said getting my PhD would be easy, but nobody
said I'd have to deal regularly with ######### ############# ############..
or that I'd be implored to use a BS########### ######### ##############
##### student as a ROLE MODEL for productivity. Just goes to
show you how deep and penetrating and believable the bull really is.
Not everybody here is like this, and there are people I know who are
genuinely interested in their research, in furthering chemistry instead
of just being focused on scoring a high-paying industrial job, or getting as
many papers in the highest-ranked chemical journal, or.. just..
{sigh}... If I work hard and get as much done as I can despite having
to be the head-TA-ultra for a very energy-draining course.., if I also work
to mold the lab I am in into a more efficient, accessible, and safe place --
all while still trying to sleep and save money and keep the little sanity I
have(!) -- and am rewarded with disrespect, distrust, and job insecurity,
then this whole situation makes me shudder, makes me sick.
I worked my butt off with classes and a job.. I shoved back the nay-sayers
so I could get to grad school. I am here at grad school now to acquire
knowledge and then create and publish NEW knowledge, benefit the world if
possible, and ultimately inspire other students to excel in the sciences, in
chemistry, in things that will advance technologies, make this
troublesome-looking future a little bit brighter.
This is why I didn't go to music conservatory way back when I had the
chance. This is why I didn't graduate to get a job in business or
international affairs. This is why I didn't go into sculpture as a
career, as rewarding as expressing myself that way is.. or into graphic
design, despite being good enough to have my cover design on the
recently-published Fundamentals of Asymmetric Catalysis. Why I
didn't do the easy thing and stay a customer service worker, or go into
cooking or bartending or coffeeshop work. And why, as interesting as
the fields are, I am not working in math or physics or biology.
Despite having won the "Renaissance Scholar" award, I'm here as an
organometallic chemist, darnit. I'm here for the chemistry.
I am sick of the BS, I am sick of the lack of accountability and
politics. This is nonsense.
-G
